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Slice of Life

Thursday, March 6, 2014

The Narcissist

"People with narcissistic personality disorder often display snobbish, disdainful, or patronizing attitudes."(

Do you know someone that has a way of making everyone in the room feel stupid? Do you know someone who always thinks their way is the only way? Someone who laughs at others, speaks in a condescending manner, and only sees the world through their own eyes?

Well I do. Actually I have had these people show up in my life multiple times. Each time the disorder is disguised to me. As it reveals itself over time, I am slow to recognize it until I am into the relationship too deep to quickly escape its perils.

Once I recognize the signs, I  think I can help the person by giving many points of view, modeling appropriate social skills, and being kind. Those tactics have never worked. In the end, I end up being the competition, target,  and recipient of their anger.

I feel for these people. They are alone. They have fleeting relationships and then have to move on to find another because they cannot sustain friendships without being in competition with the said friend/s. They have to constantly toot their own horns and are angry with those who are not quick to compliment them about each and every thing they do.
Why am I drawn to people with narcissistic behaviors? That is a question I would like to answer. I know that in each case, the person has had great work ethic and I admire that quality. Not all people with work ethic suffer from a personality disorders but it has been a consistent quality in those I have encountered.

I don't know how to help these people and their destructive behaviors toward others and me is too painful for me to endure. Do you know someone like this?


  1. I do...know more than one... I TRY to tell myself that these people are sad, unhappy. I try to tell myself that the "good guys" win at the end. Yet, like you, I am impacted by their destructive behaviors. I'm hoping someone has a suggestion beyond, "be open to them" and try to be "friendly" with them as that is very hard to do and has left me shattered more than once!

  2. It's really really sad sometimes to see someone you love and care for deeply transform to this. Yes, I do happen to know someone, more than one, like this.

    Powerfully written!